Archive | March, 2018

March 30, 2018

31 Mar

After sending my youngest off to his dad’s for the weekend, I got to spend the afternoon hanging out with my middle son and his girlfriend. We got to buy a tire and go to lunch.

Now I’m back home waiting for bedtime. My stomach hurts where I did my shot today. And I have an upset stomach.

I figured if I could just keep occupied with other things, this day of remembrance would be alright. And it is. Just needed to change my perspective.

  • I’m grateful to find an inexpensive tire today. I’m grateful to have a nice lunch this afternoon with two wonderful people. I’m grateful today didn’t suck.

Night all. LOVES

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How brains work

30 Mar

The brain is an amazing, marvelous, confusing object. It keeps a body alive and functioning with seemingly little effort. It makes connections a million times faster than the fastest computer, but is easily broken and bruised. And when it gets broken and bruised, it is really difficult to fix.

How the brain deals with all the input of our lives is one of the least known sciences on earth. And we spend very little time and money on ways to fix it when it’s not working correctly.

I know my brain has taken a few bumps in my life and it doesn’t work all the time the way I would like it to. But I have learned ways to cope with its limitations. At least most of the time.

Some days it’s just easier to let it wander where it wants to go. This week has been one of those times. It’s taken me all week to quit fighting my brain and let it wander. We’ve both been happier today. Even though it’s been wandering to places I’d rather not think about. Funny thing, a brain. As soon as I quit fighting it so hard, it quit trying to take me where I didn’t want to go.

  • I’m grateful to binge watch an old favorite series today. It’s kept my mind busy. I’m grateful to have a clean kitchen. I figured I better to go with the new burners they installed on my stove this morning. I’m grateful for another day to be alive. It’s always a blessing.

Night all. LOVES

Stress & a headache

29 Mar

Why is it that when you have a headache from hell going, everything goes wrong and it just keeps getting worse?

It startled when I couldn’t get to sleep last night because restless leg syndrome and insomnia were arguing to see who could be most annoying. Then when I did fall asleep, I was plagued by strange dreams. Then woke up at 5am with low sugar. Got back to sleep and my middle child shows up a couple of hours later. I think I only got about 4 hours sleep total.

Pollen counts are high so my sinuses are stressed right now too. My youngest has a doctor appointment. The car we were in got a flat tire. Traded cars. Took almost 40 minutes to get everyone ice cream because they were only waiting on one person at a time. Spent almost 3 hours at the doctor’s office because they needed to flush the wax out of his ears. And of course, every time he leaves the house for an appointment, he must get something to eat or else he makes sure everyone is miserable.

Finally get home and I end up doing the “mom sleep” on the couch while the kids are upstairs playing. You know, “I’m awake, I’m just resting my eyes.”

I still have a headache, but it will be alright. It’s going to be an early bedtime because we woke up so early  and we’ve been busy all day. And I got a bottle of Tylenol at the doctor’s for $2. I love buying over-the-counter for wholesale prices at my doctor’s in-house pharmacy.

  • I’m grateful I didn’t have to be on the bus all day with a headache. I’m grateful my doctor’s office decided to put an in-house pharmacy in a couple of years ago. I’m grateful for that 20 minutes to rest my eyes this afternoon.

Night all. LOVES

Food issues

28 Mar

In the past, when I was feeling down, I would get some ice cream or pizza or make a cake(and eat the whole thing). Sometimes I would buy a frozen coconut cream pie and eat that with a fork as it thawed. I KNOW it wasn’t good for me, but I did it anyway because it would spike my sugar really high and I would take a nap. Or else I would just quit eating anything. Which isn’t good for me either because it would mess with my sugar and I could take a nap. If I’m napping, I’m not needing to deal with life.

So with this new diet and trying to be healthier, I know I have to eat. And to eat stuff that isn’t cake, ice cream, or other carb heavy foods. But I am so not happy with my vegetables today.

So what’s a person on a diet to do? I put some bananas in the freezer. Here in a bit, I’ll put them in a blender, with some peanut butter for a protein hit and make a shake. Or else just throw it back into the freezer for a bit so it is like ice cream.

You learn to do the best you can with what you got right now. You can just take it one day at a time.

  • Today, I’m grateful to have bananas in the freezer. I’m grateful that my son’s LEGO Booster Box came in the mail today. I’m grateful to spend some quality time with my son building LEGOs.

Night all. LOVES

Still feeling off

27 Mar

I’ve spent most of the day upstairs in my room today. Just not wanting to do anything. I know I’m on a down cycle. I also know that what goes down must come up.

After I eat, I think I’m going to go take a hot shower and put clean pj’s on. Make the bed. Find a good movie on Netflix and just relax. Tomorrow is a new day.

  • I’m grateful for hot water. Cold showers are the worst. I’m grateful I did laundry the other day. Love me some clean pj’s. I’m grateful its spring break so I don’t need to worry about missing important appointments. Except my son’s doctor on Wednesday.

Night all. LOVES

Whining today

26 Mar

I didn’t sleep well last night. I had nightmares and strange dreams. And I woke up with a sore stomach. Not an upset stomach, but a hurt stomach. I have a huge bruise and it’s all swollen where I did my shot this week.

I didn’t make it to church this morning because I hurt too much to get up. And I fell back asleep as soon as I turned off the alarm. I can’t find anything to watch online. I can’t seem to get into my book. And I can’t seem to find another one that interests me. I’m cold and can’t get warm. The sun is shining but I’m having a rainy day attitude.

I’m craving a bowl of Cheerios or a waffle with a ton of butter and syrup. I don’t want to cook. I don’t want to cut up veggies. I’m tired of counting carbs, fats, and proteins. And whether or not I’m getting enough or too much.

I’m just grumpy and annoyed at life today. I want to just go back to bed and start the day over, but I’m not tired enough to be ready to go to sleep.

  • I’m grateful to be able to have a place for my whining without going off on others. You all can quit reading if I am annoying you. I’m grateful to have food I don’t want to make. Last week I was hungry. I’m grateful to know that as grumpy as I feel right now, I know that I will turn a corner and not be so grumpy in the future.

Night all. LOVES

Saturday, March 24th

25 Mar

Today has been spent reading and listening to music while my child watches movies and plays an online game with his friends. Nothing really exciting.

I made some chicken soup for dinner. I hope there are leftovers for tomorrow, but my son really likes it. He’s already talking about getting more. Actually, he’s hinting that I should get up and get him some because he doesn’t want to move. He’s got those puppy dog eyes going and begging, please mommy. If you love me, you will get it for me!

  • I’m grateful to the neighbor for giving me some soup bullion for dinner. I’m grateful the first day of spring break has gone so well. Nobody is bored yet. I’m grateful that I know if I wait long enough, he will get up and get his own stuff.

Night all. LOVES