Archive | February, 2018

When your child struggles

28 Feb

I have found out this week that my youngest has been avoiding a particular class for a while. I know he has learning disabilities and his teachers are doing well trying to help him, but when he isn’t interested in that help, I’m at a loss for ways to help.

Now that I know, I’m hoping that his teachers and I can come up with some ways to help him succeed. At least enough to pass. He needs this class to graduate high school.

It’s so hard to watch your child sink into himself as he gets further and further behind. Especially because this is a general education class. I know that letting his peers see him struggling is so difficult for teenagers, especially mine.

  • I’m grateful to finally be getting to the bottom of why he’s been wanting to stay home sick so often. And wanting to come home in the middle of the day. I’m grateful for his amazing teachers who are willing to go out of their way to help struggling students. I’m grateful he was comfortable enough to be willing to talk to me about what is troubling him. Even if it took him a while to do so. Now to help him do better.

Night all. LOVES

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Gratefulness

27 Feb

On this journey I have been on since I decided to get clean, there have been many ups and downs. Good days and bad days and some days that were bits of both. But through it all, the one constant has been my gratitude list. I started it the day I met my first sponsor. It was my first homework assignment. At times, I thought it was stupid. Why keep doing this every day? How is this going to help me stay clean?

Slowly, bit by bit, I have changed. I am no longer that person who hated everything and everyone, especially herself. I was hopeless and didn’t think I deserved anything.

But because of gratitude, I have learned that I matter. I don’t hate everything and everyone anymore. I don’t always like them, but I don’t hate them. I’m even starting to like me and what I’m doing and where I’m heading. I have hope. And dreams and wants. And faith that it will all work out in the end.

  • Today I’m grateful for this journey. I’m grateful to have the many blessings I have. All of our needs are met. We have a home to keep us warm and dry and safe from the outside. We have food that keeps us full and happy even if sometimes it feels like we’re always eating the same thing. And I’m grateful we have each other. I wouldn’t be where I am without everyone who touched my life in some way. Because it has made me who I am.

Night all. LOVES

Final thought.
~”What IF, the only things you had tomorrow were only the things you ARE grateful for today? WHAT would YOU have?”~

Peanut sauce

27 Feb

It’s been a while since I have posted a recipe. I can’t come up with new things to make if I’m mostly eating fresh veggies all the time.

But I have come up with a yummy sauce to dip the veggies in. I came up with it after eating at a Thai restaurant and I used it with spaghetti noodles. Now I use it as a dip. Still tastes delicious.

In a small bowl, mix 2 tablespoons peanut butter, crunchy or smooth. 2 tablespoons soy sauce, I use a light, less sodium one. 1 tablespoon fish sauce, I use the one in the blue bottle. 1 teaspoon yellow mustard. 1 teaspoon honey or a small squeeze of the bear. Mix well. Season with pepper, garlic powder and sriracha to taste.

I would mix this with noodles as is. It’s great in ramen noodle soup. I have added 2 tablespoons vinegar and 4 tablespoons vegetable oil to make salad dressing. I add 2 tablespoons brown sugar and leave the peanut butter out and it’s an amazing ‘teriyaki type’ sauce. Although I am tempted to leave the peanut butter in after watching a video on chicken satay. I’ll let you know how it goes.

  • I’m grateful that I have learned to improvise and experiment in the kitchen to make delicious food. I very seldom make something that I need to throw out. I’m grateful I’m adjusting to my diet so well. Although I WAS thinking about a pear dump cake today. I’m grateful there is so much information available online to research new tastes and ideas.

Night all. LOVES

I’m an example

26 Feb

Have you ever known someone to whine all the time because nobody ever comes to ask him to play? And then when they do, he tells them he doesn’t want to? I was really annoyed with my child about it today. Until I realized that I do the exact same thing.

I’m always feeling left out because nobody calls to do anything anymore. But when they do, I always beg off. It’s too far. It’s too late. It’s too expensive. It’s too much. No wonder the calls quit coming.

I have become such a homebody and it’s contagious. My child is following in my footsteps. I think it’s time to get us out of our comfort zone and get outside. Go meet people. Do things. Now to just figure out low cost, close in things to do. I think I need to do some research and get us both moving.

  • I’m grateful to make it to church today. It took everything I had to go. I’m grateful for insight. It shows me what I need to fix in myself. I’m grateful tomorrow is a new day and another chance to do something different.

Night all. LOVES

The day after

25 Feb

Its been a lazy day recovering from yesterday. Still feeling pretty rough. Everything hurts and it’s making me feel yucky.

  • I’m grateful I went to the store the other day. Frozen burritos for my child’s dinner. I’m grateful for Tylenol. I’m grateful to make it up and down the stairs today. Now to make it back up.

Night all. LOVES

Too many buses

24 Feb

I have reached the end of my endurance for the day. I had to have my middle child help me up to bed tonight. I think being on the go since 8am was a bit much?

I’ve been downtown, up on the hill at the doctor’s, NE Portland, back downtown, out to SE Portland to watch a basketball game, and a ride home in traffic today. And I took my Friday shot that makes me sick.

But on the good side, I’m taking even less insulin. My A1c has gone from a 7.6 to 6.1 in a month. And I’ve lost another 2 pounds this week. So all things considered, I’d say it’s pretty much even.

  • I’m grateful for the ride home. I don’t think I would have made it on the bus. I’m grateful I only need to take my one shot on Fridays. More than once a week would suck. I’m grateful to watch my son sink 2 baskets at the ball game. I’m so proud of him and his team. Their sportsmanship is outstanding!

Night all. LOVES

Trading vegetables

23 Feb

I’ve been doing this new diet for almost a month and while it’s been satisfying, it also has its challenges. Here are my top two.

How to afford to eat healthy? It is so much cheaper to use rice and pasta as the main part of a meal and use meat and veggies as the enhancers. But to concentrate on the vegetables and lean protein with lots to no carb heavy foods is tough on a limited budget. I’ll admit that I’ve eaten lots of peanut butter this month so that I could afford the vegetables. I’m hoping that as I get more practice, I will do better with budgeting.

When you add vegetables to your diet, you are adding fiber and roughage, which leads to digestion issues. Good ones and not so good ones. You tend to feel fuller longer, but your methane production is greater. Sometimes I wonder what died! It gets bad. I’m hoping that as I continue, my gut will acclimatize and it will get better.

  • I’m grateful that I’ve been able to do this for a month. That means it’s one step closer to becoming a habit. I’m grateful to be in recovery because I’m using the 12 steps knowledge I’ve learned around my eating. I’m really grateful to have lost almost 20 pounds.

Night all. LOVES